Life's Surprises
by adaud
Summary: Righting the wrongs of the series finale, this is a future fic that details the life of Barney and Robin as a happily married couple.
1. Chapter 1

**New York City, April 2016**

"Robin," Patrice called out as soon as she spotted Robin weaving her way through the maze of desks and cubicles on her way to her corner office, "how did the interview go? Did you get your statement? Ah, what am I saying; of course you have. Let me take your bag, it looks heavy. I have your messages right here. Do you want to go over them now or later? I put the urgent ones on your desk already, so these can-"

"Not now, Patrice!" Robin shrieked, already irritated by her assistant and not slowing down a bit, even though she had never been able to shake Patrice off who always caught up easily, despite Robin's longer legs. Robin still considered it a cruel joke from the universe that even after leaving World Wide News she couldn't escape Patrice. Worse even - now the woman she couldn't stand was her assistant. How that had come to be Robin wasn't entirely sure about, but she blamed Patrice exclusively. She had probably told Robin's new bosses a tale of how well they used to work together. Unfortunately, Robin had been too new at this job to already make demands when it came to choosing her own assistant or even veto her superiors' choice. Also, she'd been too happy about finally being a real reporter who got sent on assignments to interview important people or cover news stories and big events to bother, at the time.

"Okay," Patrice relented easily, used and long immune to Robin's outbursts. "I'll come by after lunch then. Do you want your coffee now?"

"Yes," Robin pressed out between clenched teeth, annoyed at the completely unnecessary question.

"I'll get it for you. Be right back." Before the woman finally left her alone, Patrice turned and called back, "Uhm, Robin, your private line has been ringing all morning. Seems someone's trying to get a hold of you."

"You don't say," Robin murmured, careful not to be heard.

After one too many incidents involving Lily spilling the beans and inviting Patrice along to a girls' night out, Patrice was no longer allowed to answer Robin's private line which wasn't really Robin's private line, but was the number that only her closest friends and informants knew and which was unlisted to avoid calls from various PR managers, sleazy attorneys, random threats from scorned persons of interest that Robin had exposed on air, and all kinds of other scum her regular journalism job brought with it.

Robin stepped into her office, firmly closing the door behind her and slipping off her heels, throwing them into the padded chair in the corner. She sighed in relief. Looking good for the camera did have its disadvantages, especially if you had to stand in front of the Court House all morning since the early dawn.

She eyed the stack of papers and post-it notes on her desk. It wasn't even noon yet and already she was exhausted. She couldn't wait for the weekend to come. Two whole days with nothing to do but lounge around the apartment and not answer calls or rush to a super-urgent something somewhere in the city.

Robin sat down in her chair and with sloping shoulders picked up the topmost note. She had to start somewhere.

She had barely read through the handwritten message when her phone rang. She picked it up, eyes still locked on the writing in front of her, and answered distractedly, "Stinson."

"Mhh," the voice on the other end of the line sounded, "I'll never get tired of hearing that."

Robin smiled, a little bit of the tension draining out of her just from the sound of his voice. "Barney," she breathed. "You'll never get tired of hearing what?"

"You, wearing my name," he replied.

On air she still went by Scherbatsky. But legally she had been Robin Stinson for almost three years now.

"Yeah, you seem very partial to me wearing your things - your shirt, your ring, your name. Is that a fetish?" she wondered aloud.

"That's one word for it. I'm sure our friends would come up with a few other ones, depending on who you ask," Barney replied. "But I do wish we had more time that we spent with you wearing all of the above - and nothing else."

Robin's mind drifted away. "Hmm. That does sound good."

"Great. I hoped you'd agree."

Robin tuned back in. "Agree to what?" She sounded suspicious which was basically the default setting with Barney anyway.

"How soon can you be ready? Do you think you can meet me at JFK in about 90 minutes?"

"Barney," Robin sighed and took a deep breath before continuing. "Can't you for once give me a little bit of a head start?" Three years ago, she would have still been surprised by his hairbrained and sudden plans, but she had had enough time to grow accustomed to them since then.

"I tried," Barney defended himself, "But you had your phone switched off again."

"You knew I was on air," Robin argued.

"Oh, I saw that," Barney suddenly remembered. "That was live? You were awesome by the way."

"Thanks. And yes, it is always live. You think we pre-record news? Besides, I was wearing the dress which you helped me zip this morning. Twice," she added as she remembered their extended goodbye in the kitchen.

"Yeah, I did," Barney drawled and Robin could practically hear the gleeful smirk on his face. "Phone five."

Then she recognized his insert for what it was and exclaimed, "Hey! Don't change the topic. We agreed you wouldn't spring this on me anymore."

"No, we most definitely did not agree to anything like that. I'd remember."

"Sure we did. Not even four months ago, in that cute little hotel in Aspen, with the huge fireplace."

"Oh, you mean that time when you were stripping for me? I have been wondering what the hell I had said yes to back then. Well, that's not gonna hold up in court. Check with Marshall; he'll agree with me. You weren't playing fair, distracting me with your wily womanly ways. And by 'ways' I mean boobs."

"It's not my fault your mind is a one-way street," Robin protested even though she knew she was fighting a losing battle.

Barney's voice rose a couple of octaves. "Deep red lace, Robin! No man can be held accountable for things that come out of his mouth when his wife is wearing deep red see-through lace!"

"Alright, alright," Robin relented, secretly enjoying the fact that her husband of three years was still rendered speechless whenever her hands strayed to the buttons of her blouse.

"So, where are we going?"

"Does this mean you're on board?" Barney asked excitedly.

"I don't know yet. Tell me the destination first."

"Brazil."

"Beach?"

"Plenty."

"Hmm," Robin pondered. "It does sound nice. But I can't," she almost whined, eyeing the stack of unanswered messages.

"Come on, babe," Barney pleaded. "I talked to Patrice and she told me there's no important appointments or deadlines in the next week and a half. And anything urgent can be covered by someone else for a change. Besides, you've been exhausted for weeks."

It was true. The workload was so overwhelming, Robin barely found time to sleep. Of course, horizontal activities with Barney contributed to the sleep deprivation because they always took precedence over sleep and, fantastic though they were, in the long run didn't help her exhaustion levels.

"We haven't made use of our handcuffs in weeks," Barney complained like a petulant child while Robin rolled her eyes.

"Did you pack them?" Robin asked. Because there was no question that he had already packed.

"Please," he confirmed, "like you have to ask."

"Still, only 90 minutes, Barney?"

"Uh, make it 75 now," Barney interjected.

"How am I supposed to get home, pack, and make it to the airport on time?"

"You don't have to pack and Ranjit is waiting downstairs for you, so... whenever you're ready."

Robin sighed in defeat, but then realized what she was agreeing to and a slow smile crept onto her face. A vacation, away from New York, just her and Barney - it did sound like the most perfect thing she could imagine right now. Barney had become really good at giving her exactly what she needed before she even thought of it.

"I hope you packed more than just my bikini," she said, trying to sound stern. After all, it had happened before and the circumstances were frighteningly similar to the first surprise vacation Barney had sprung on her after their honeymoon .

"We'll go shopping first thing after our arrival," Barney replied instead of an answer. That too was slowly becoming a routine of their surprise vacations. Robin wasn't complaining; and if she was, it was only to keep up appearances to keep Barney's ego in check, which required a lot of time and work after all.

"Fine," Robin agreed, though her compliance had never really been in question anyway. "I assume Patrice is in on that and has already cleared the time away with my bosses?"

"Yes. She's a doll."

"Yeah," Robin muttered under her breath, "and as lovable as Chucky."

"Hey, Robin," Barney said, thinking of something, "just think - in less than twelve hours we're sipping Margaritas on the beach."

"Ohh," Robin moaned longingly. She wouldn't say no to a drink right now either. "Okay, okay. I'll finish up here real quick and meet you in a bit."

"Awesome. Love you."

"Love you too."

Robin was almost about to hang up when Barney's voice sounded again.

"Hey, Mrs. Stinson?"

"Yeah?"

"We've actually somewhat over two hours before our flight departs. I thought we'd start the vacation early by celebrating in one of the airport's bathroom stalls."

"Aww," Robin mocked him, "ever the romantic."

"Only the best for my wife. Hey, speaking of only the best for my wife-"

Robin sensed a lewd joke coming and hung up before Barney could verbalize it. But she couldn't help but shake her head fondly at him. Being married to Barney had turned out exactly how she had expected it to; meaning it was unlike anything she could have ever foreseen because it was absolutely impossible to anticipate what he would come up with next. And that was exactly how Robin liked it.

* * *

_**This can stay a oneshot or it can turn into a multi-chaptered something. I've an idea where I want to take the story, but please let me know what you think.**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

**Fernando de Noronha, April 2016**

It was after midnight, the food on the small table had long since been replaced by delicious cocktails that magically kept reappearing whenever the glasses got empty – Lily would have loved this place; Barney and Robin sure did. The live band kept playing a mix of jazzy tunes and flamenco rumba pieces and most guests of the small sidewalk café clapped along as they enjoyed their night.

The sky above was littered with millions of stars and despite the late hour the air was still sun-warm, with a gentle breeze wafting over from the Atlantic. Barney tilted his head and looked curiously at Robin who was gazing out onto the ocean. Then he reached for his drink and drowned the remnants in one gulp. He loosened another button on the collar of his linen shirt, sleeves already rolled up to above the elbows, and stood up, extending one arm to Robin in invitation. Jarred by his movements, she turned to look at him.

"What-?" Realizing what he had in mind, she shook her head. "Barney, no."

He only raised his eyebrows at her and wiggled the fingers of his extended hand with impatience.

"We can't," Robin protested. "There's not even a dance floor."

Barney looked behind him at the open street and sidewalk along which the tables were scattered. "Looks like this is more than enough space for a dance."

Robin again shook her head, but couldn't help the smile that appeared on her face. She tried to bite down on it to not let it show that he'd already won her over. But Barney grinned his victorious smile in response and she had no choice but to place her hand in his palm. He immediately pulled her to her feet and twirled her into his body as soon as she was standing.

Robin had to brace herself against his chest to avoid a collision; but she laughed and after a few moments they assumed a proper dancing position and caught on the rumba rhythm of the song playing.

It wasn't the perfectly choreographed dance routine of their wedding reception; they weren't dancing for applause. There was a whole lot of body contact and movements almost too intimate to be considered seemly, but this was a vacation destination and normal rules of proper etiquette didn't apply. Besides, the other patrons didn't seem to mind and were captivated nevertheless.

When the fast-paced song ended a few of the guests clapped. Robin looked around and realized they had gathered quite an audience. She blushed from the unexpected attention and was about to reprimand Barney, but the band began playing a slower piece and she didn't get the chance as Barney pulled her closer into his arms and began swaying to the almost wistful tune. Their audience went back to their drinks, not minding the dancing couple.

"Wanna go back to the hotel?" he whispered close to her ear after a while, his palm warm against her lower back.

"Yeah," she replied, voice suddenly hoarse.

Barney pulled a wad of bills from his pocket, dropping a few on the table as he wrapped an arm around Robin and guided her down the dimly lit street towards a row of identical looking condos.

* * *

Robin was sprawled out atop the covers of the King sized bed, clad only in a white lace slip – the only remaining piece of clothing that Barney hadn't yet come around to pull off her. He was busy worshipping her body by kissing down a straight line all the way from her throat, between her breasts, all across her stomach and down to her belly. There he lingered, scattering butterfly kisses in a semi-circle underneath her navel, taking his sweet time. His lips paused, warm against her heated skin, and he raised his head, regarding Robin carefully.

Robin, who up to this point had been enjoying his ministrations with her head thrown back and eyes closed, realized with a moment's delay that Barney had stopped. She lifted her head from the pillow, the movement feeling lazy and slow thanks to the alcohol and Barney's talent to ignite a deep-rooted slow-burning want inside her with the flick of a tongue.

"What is it?" she asked, voice feeling as heavy as her limbs did.

"Huh?"

"Why'd you stop?"

Barney's eyes cleared as though he was being pulled out of deep contemplations. "Oh, sorry," he said and smiled mysteriously. He still didn't move and Robin was about to release a frustrated groan. Before she could, though, Barney pressed his lips to her belly again and climbed up the bed till he was level with her. Looking her in the eyes, he said, "You're beautiful like this, you know that?"

Robin just smiled. She never could resist him when he was being all mushy and affectionate, not that she had a reason to try. With a hand on the back of his head she pulled him down and kissed him passionately, breaking the slow and hazy spell of their previous lovemaking. Barney surrendered and pushed his tongue against her invading one, forgetting everything else.

Barney blinked his eyes open, not knowing what woke him, and felt that familiar ache and heaviness in his body that was always a sure sign of a night well spent even before he remembered all its details correctly. His head felt a little woozy, but nothing that a long hot shower wouldn't cure. Maybe he could convince Robin to join him. Hmm.

"Good morning," Robin whispered into his ear and Barney drifted to consciousness enough to recognize Robin's fingertips dancing along his ribcage. He pulled his arm from under his head and rolled to his back, giving Robin more room for her wandering fingers. Closing his eyes again, he let himself enjoy his wife's lips as she placed random gentle kisses all over his chest.

She mumbled between them, "Don't fall asleep."

Barney's laugh rumbled out of him. "I'm awake," he reassured her.

"Do we have plans for today?" Robin asked, moving down on the bed a little.

"I'm sensing you do."

Barney could feel her smile against his skin. "There's this cave I read about in the travel guide. Thank you, by the way, for picking the book up at the airport. It sounds like a cool place to check out. But I can go alone if you think that's lame."

"A cave," Barney murmured, thinking. He wasn't really the sightseeing kind of guy. "Like a Batman kind of cave?" he asked with the voice of an over-excited four-year-old.

"Yes, Barney, exactly like a Batman kind of cave." There was a ton of sarcasm in her voice, but as usual, Barney didn't hear it.

"I'm in," Barney exclaimed. Robin chuckled as she picked up kissing down his torso again. After a pause Barney asked, "Do you think we'll be back before say six-ish?"

"Why?"

"Well, uhm... Remember Mangai?"

Robin had to pause and think for a moment. "That place where we celebrated my promotion?"

"Yes."

"Yeah, I do remember. I also remember it being on mainland and in case you haven't noticed, we're on an island."

"It's only one phone call... no, _two_ phone calls and a 90 minutes helicopter flight away," Barney stated.

Robin stared at him, face serious. "You're crazy."

"What do you say, Scherbatsky?" Barney asked, ignoring her assessment regarding his mental faculties. He still liked to use his old pet name for her even though it was, technically, no longer valid.

Robin looked at him to gauge whether he was serious. He was, which she had already expected. After all, it was just crazy enough for someone like Barney. "Yeah. Yeah, why the hell not. Let's do it," she let herself be infected by his enthusiasm.

Barney grinned and leaned over the bed, reaching for his phone. First he called the restaurant to make a reservation, then he arranged for a helicopter to pick them up. All the while he tried to ignore Robin's touches and kisses that had progressed into the x-rated territory. Barney bit his lip trying not to moan out loud into the phone while still on the line with the pilot.

"You're an evil minx," he drily commented after finishing the phone call.

She pulled off of him with a wet and obscene-sounding pop and grinned mischievously. "Are you done?" she asked.

"If you mean our plans for tonight's dinner, then yes, we're all set."

Robin couldn't help but marvel at Barney's willingness and ability to follow through with even the craziest of plans. "You're the best."

"Yes," he smirked, "you told me that last night already. Repeatedly."

She shook her head at him, but her amused smile remained firmly in place.

"Are you gonna finish what you started?" Barney asked, motioning with his eyebrows towards the lower part of his own body.

Robin spared him a glance before suggesting, "How about we finish it in the shower together?"

"Woman, it's like you can read my mind," Barney said and climbed out of bed, pulling Robin with him.

"Oh, hey," Robin said, "maybe I can wear that little blue dress you like so much. You know, the one with the cascading open back."

Barney's eyes glinted in agreement. He knew exactly which dress she meant. It was a short, tight, indigo blue piece that fit Robin's frame like a second skin and showed off her legs and which had Barney salivating just remembering her inside it, but which he didn't get to see her in too often because Robin found it too revealing for any work related functions. So she only wore it whenever they went someplace tropical for a vacation. Robin looked stunning in it and Barney wholeheartedly approved of the choice. The evening couldn't come fast enough.

"Hey, Barney?" Robin said as she reached inside the shower to turn on the water.

"Hm?"

"It's probably nothing like the Batman cave."

Barney sighed dejectedly. "I figured."

"You still in?" She dropped her underwear and got under the spray.

Barney watched her, unmoving, mouth slack, eyes roving up and down her now wet body. "Sure," he agreed in a daze.

Robin laughed and Barney tried, unsuccessfully, to remember what they had been talking about.

* * *

"You know what would make this day even more perfect?" Robin asked, turning her head towards Barney but keeping her eyes closed in the bright sun.

They had spent the day in the underwater caves, just as Robin had wanted to, and had returned from their outing about an hour ago. There were still a couple of hours' time before they had to get ready for their dinner plans, so Robin had suggested to spent them by the pool. While Robin was working on her tan, Barney had been halfheartedly clicking through his work emails on his iPad, deleting the boring ones and forwarding the ones featuring funny youtube videos to his friends and colleagues.

"What?" Barney asked in reply to Robin's question.

"A couple frozen margaritas," she answered and hummed.

Barney got up immediately, without a moment's hesitation, saying, "On it. Two margaritas coming right up."

He made for the bar before Robin could even point out that he didn't need to get up since they could have ordered the drinks from the waiter making the rounds between the hotel guests lounging around the pool area.

Barney returned a few minutes later with two glasses in hand. He handed one to Robin who accepted it gratefully. She smiled and took a few sips.

"Hm," she said and Barney looked at her sideways, taking a sip of his own drink.

"What?" he asked.

"I don't know," she replied. She picked up the slice of lime and stirred in her drink with it absentmindedly before sipping on it again. "My drink tastes funny," she finally said.

Barney creased his forehead. "Funny how?"

Robin took another sip, trying to figure out what was wrong with it. "I'm not sure. Let me taste yours." She held her own glass towards him. Barney took it, replacing it with his own. "Yours tastes funny too," Robin decided, taking back her drink.

"It's probably all the spicy food you had for lunch," Barney reasoned. "Your taste buds have gone all wonky."

"It wasn't _that_ spicy."

"Robin," Barney replied seriously, "they put your name down in the 'Spicy-Hot Hall of Fame' and the chef personally came out of the kitchen to shake your hand."

Robin shrugged and leaned back in her beach chair, grinning but not saying anything more. She sipped the rest of her drink without complaints.

Barney stole a surreptitious glance at her and sighed relieved. That was a close one. Just like at lunch when Robin had ordered a scotch for each of them while Barney had gone to the restroom to wash his hands.

"Look," Robin had said, motioning to the two waiting glasses, "they had Glen McKenna at the bar."

"Oh." The sound had escaped Barney's mouth before he could reign it in. "Uhm... I... I'm not really in the mood for scotch."

Robin had looked at him quizzically. "Since when are you not in the mood for scotch?" she had asked.

"Gosh, Robin, you make it sound like I'm an alcoholic." When that hadn't derailed her, Barney pointed at the far wall where a huge board framed by images of red-hot chili peppers showcased a handful of names. "Look," he'd said, "looks like this bar has a standing hot chili pepper challenge going on. Eat five of these little bastards and your meal is free; for 10 they put your name on the wall."

Robin had perked up with interest and while she wasn't looking Barney quickly downed both glasses, actually needing them after that almost near-miss.

* * *

Hours later, an impatient Barney was pacing up and down the expanse of their hotel suite. His phone beeped a second time and he sat down on the bed to answer it.

"Yes," he said. "I understand." He paused, listening to the voice on the other end. "Five more minutes," he spoke into the receiver. "We'll be there right away."

He ended the call and walked up to the opposite side of the suite, stopping in front of the bathroom door. "Robin, that was the pilot again. He can't wait for much longer."

There was no reply.

"Robin?"

Still no reply. Now Barney was getting nervous. He knocked on the door separating him from his wife. "Are you okay?" When there was still no reply, he tried another tactic. "Scherbatsky, don't make me go all manly and kick the door in."

Before he could knock again, he heard the click that told him she'd released the lock on the door. Cautious as to what he would find on the other side of the door, he opened it.

Robin stood in front of the large mirror, wearing the blue dress he loved, but it was unzipped. Her hand rested flat on her belly, her eyes firmly on her own reflection. Barney took a deep breath and bit his lip nervously as he watched her quietly. After a moment or two she met his eyes in the mirror. Neither said a word.

His gaze flickered to the side. There, on the shower curtain rail, hang two or three more dresses, haphazardly thrown there.

Robin's eyes followed his and she stared at the discarded dresses, murmuring, barely distinguishable. "They don't fit. None of them." Then she turned her head to look at him in the mirror again. "I don't fit in any of them."

She folded both her hands across her lower belly, as if shielding it, and turned around, facing him. "Barney?" she shakily mumbled.

* * *

**So, this was the direction I was planning on taking this story all along. I realize it's not everyone's cup of tea. I could stop this here or I could write more. I leave it up to my readers. Let me know if you are interested in reading how this story progresses. In any case, should there be more chapters, I will try to end each one in a way that could also act as the end of the story. So it's really all up to you. :-)**

**I hope you all enjoyed and thank you to everyone who has left feedback on the first chapter. Your responses have been truly overwhelming. **


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